söndag 27 april 2014

Bro´s Before Ho´s

I love the Netherlands. So nice people, and i love Amsterdam. I am going back at some point, because there is so much to see and do in Amsterdam, you better make sure you have time to experience everything. I am not only talking about tulip gardens or museums, there are many great stores, restaurants, coffee shops, and of course there is Red Light District. This area is were all the fun is happening. You can do anything here, have sex on stage, watch striptease, there is also fun sex shops and other fun places to visit in this area. What about night clubs ? Well, i think i need to check that out next time. But i hear Amsterdam is supposed to be a great night life city. When it comes to movies made in the Netherlands, i am not very good with titles or actors. Here in Sweden we don´t get to see that many releases on dvd, i suppose because french, italian and english movies get more attention. Bro´s Before Ho´s is a comedy that got a lot of positive reviews lately, so i had to see what this is all about. Is this a new comedy classic from the Netherlands, or is this just another stupid comedy made for college teenagers that no one will remember?

Two brothers Jules (Daniel Arends) and Max (Tim Haars), made a pact as kids. Never have a relatsionship, since their parents always argued. As they become older, they live the life, party almost every night and sleep around with all kinds of girls. They both belive they are gangsta, and they think they know the gangsta language. This seems to work on younger women, so they continue to live for the day. Max works in a videostore, renting out movies. Jules work at a supermarket, where he is banging chicks at the warehouse. One day Anna ( Sylvia Hoeks ) walks in to the videostore Max work in, and Max falls in love instantly. But the problem is Anna is spending time with Jules, so Max need to get her interested in him instead. The pact that these 2 brothers made all those years ago seems to be slipping away.

Bro´s Before Ho´s is a mix of American Pie, Harold And Kumar and other american comedies about stupid guys who only want to sleep around with girls. The difference is that since this is made in a european way, the vulgar language feels more suitable. These 2 guys may get lots of sex, but underneath the surface they have nothing to be proud of. From a comedy perspective, this is a really funny movie. The dialogue is silly, vulgar and the boys think they are gangsta, and talk like they are hustlers. The problem is, they are no hustlers or not gangsta, they are just 2 stupid guys. And that is what makes Bro´s Before Ho´s so funny. These losers think they have it all, and they have no idea what actually women want. One detail that makes Bro´s Before Ho´s funny, is that fact that character Max loves the movie First Blood so much, that he watch it everyday, and know all the dialogue. He even try to do a Rambo rescue, ( while he is working in the videostore and is being robbed ), to save Anna from the robber. I am laughing as hell when Max and his brother Jules tries to be gangsta, they don´t even look gangsta or sound gangsta, and this makes them hilarious. Directors Steffen Haars and Flip Van Der Kuil give us a real treat here, with many funny dialogue scenes.  Bro´s Before Ho´s is the funniest european comedy i have seen this year, guys will guaranteed love this one, and i think women will also, if they like vulgar comedies. You can buy the dvd from some european countries, so i suggest you take a look on the web, this is guaranteed to give you a great night with friends. Now i must dress gangsta, and roll down the streets of Skönsberg on my bicycle, it does not get more gangsta than that players.

Rating: DDDD

lördag 26 april 2014

Devil´s Due

Yes folks, it is time for another documentary styled found footage horror film. As i have mentioned earlier years, i enjoy this genre if the movie is well made, on a limited budget. There are plenty of good ones, but one of the best titles that you should see is the first The Last Exorcism. Very good acting, and a great plot. Unfortunately, there are many titles coming out every year, some are really awful, who try to be scary without any effort. Devil´s Due landed in american cinemas the same month as Paranormal Activity : The Marked Ones. There are 2 very different stories, even if they both are filmed in a documentary style. Devil´s Due might not sound like anything fresh in the genre, but is it possible the content make this one more interesting, or is it the same ingredients done all over again, for no reason at all ?

 Zach McCall ( Zach Gilford ) and Samantha McCall ( Allison Miller ) are a married couple. They go on a honeymoon vacation to the Dominican Republic, and they are both having a great time. Samantha is curious about going in to a fortune teller, to hear about her future. But the fortune teller suddenly tell her evil things, so Samantha want to leave. While looking for the road to their hotel, both of them are lost. A taxi driver stops and offer them a ride. But he does not want to take them to their hotel, instead he convince them both to go to a night club. Samantha is not sure, but agree. The night is going well after all, until both of them suddenly fall asleep. Samantha is taken to a ritual, where a satanic cult lay a curse on her, from an unknown force. The next they both wake up at their hotel room, not knowing what happened last night. As they go back to their normal life, Samantha finds out she is pregnant. Zach is really happy that he is about to become a father. But the pregnancy seem strange, Samantha is changing and doing many odd things in their house. Zach need to find out what really happened to Samantha on their vacation, someone must have an answer.

I would not call Devil´s Due a found footage film, since this is supposed to be filmed right when everything is happening, and no one else found this video. The style is still typical this genre, and Devil´s Due could be influenced by Rosemary´s Baby. This is not awful in any way, i just feel bored while watching Devil´s Due, mostly because there is not much interesting here to pick up. We get some satanic worship scenes, and some usual scary moments,. But when the final scenes runs off, i feel like there could have been so much more to do with this material. This is too bad, because Devil´s Due is directed by directors Tyle Gillett and Matt Bettinelli-Olpin, 2 of the directors who worked on the first chapter of V/H/S/. They should be able to do something better than this, since V/H/S/ was so good. I guess they might have stepped into the wrong project. There are a few good ideas here, and in a few scenes they manage to make the enviroment scary. But that is all, the final product feel very predictable and we have seen this before. If you love this genre, you might enjoy Devil´s Due, i recommend you rent The Last Exorcism instead.

Rating: DD

torsdag 24 april 2014


Let me start by saying, i am not a typical religious person. I don´t visit church often or read the bible. This does not mean i have anything against religious people. I belive that no matter what religion we choose, we all have the right to choose our own way. And this is what i have done. But i will say this. I am skeptical about churches against gay people, but still we find out that male preachers have sex with other men, this makes no sense at all. Every church should welcome any member, no matter if you are gay or straight. I don´t think Jesus would say that gay people are less worthy, i am pretty sure he would accept them for who they are. Speaking of the bible, there are many characters that have been made into tv films, or even major studio motion pictures. One of the biggest box office hits of all time, based on Jesus, was The Passion Of The Christ. Mel Gibson directed this very powerful motion picture where we followed the story how Jesus died in his final days. There was a lot of reactions on this movie adaption back in 2004, from many different religious organisations. But the audience did not seem to care, it was a huge box office success. So here we are, with a different story based on the character Noah, you probably heard the story Noah And The Ark.

As a very young boy, Noah becomes a witness of his father Lamech ( Marton Csokas ), being killed by Tubal-cain ( Ray Winstone ). As the years go by, Noah ( Russel Crowe ) is now living with his wife Naameh ( Jennifer Connely ) and their children Shem ( Douglas Booth ) , Ham (
Logan Lerman ) and Japheth ( Leo McHugh Carroll ). Noah is haunted by vivid dreams, and have seen signs like instant growing flowers, so he decide to take the family to their grandfather Methuselah ( Anthony Hopkins ). On their way to Methuselah, they find dead people, who seems to be killed in battle. There is one survivor, a girl named Ila ( Emma Watson ). She joins the family on their journey. Tubal-cains army chase Noah and his family, but they manage to survive thanks to the stone golems, known as Watchers. Methuselah gives Noah a seed, that can make a forest grow within seconds. The whole family begin building an ark, that Noah was told to build from above. Noah realise they need to work hard, to get the ark finished. Tubal-cain is prepared to attack the ark, and he have an idea. If he could get help from one of Noha´s sons, he might be able to kill Noah.

As usual, some religious groups have spoken about differences between the bible and the character Noah in the movie. Personally i have no idea what the changes are, i just try and focus on my opinion about the motion picture overall. If there is one positive thing about this adaption, it is that there are some majestic battle scenes, especially between the stone golems and Tubal-cain´s army. I think this is the first time i have ever seen so much action in a biblical story, and that is a very good sign. Russel Crowe is good as Noah, maybe not his best performance, but much better than in A Good Year ( oh man that was a cheesy one ). Ray Winstone fits pretty well as the evil Tubal-cain, as he try to do anything to destroy Noah´s life. So let´s get to the problems. The length is one thing, it feels very drawn out in some scenes, like director Darren Aronofsky just let the scenes become longer than necessary. Another problem is that the storyline feel very light, let me explain. If you have read the story, you know what will happen, but there are absolutely no new twists here, no surprises. And i think that would have been a good thing, even if some religious people would be against that. If you make a storyline too simple, you will eventually feel like you would hope for a different twist. And that is what i did, i really hoped director Darren Aronofsky would deliver something stronger. We are talking about the director of Requiem Of A Dream, The Wrestler and The Swan, so we know he is very talented. Unfortunately this is not one of his best motion pictures, it´s ok but does not deliver enough to hold together all the way. If you are a religious person, i think Noah might appeal to you, if you are not, my advice is to buy Hobo With A Shotgun on blu-ray, and hear Rutger Hauer bless you with the word Hallelujah, and fire of a shotgun on 2 thugs. Now that is my kind of church.

Rating: DD

tisdag 22 april 2014

American Hustle

I was born in 1977. Since i was born so late in the 70´s, i don´t remember much about those years. But my dad told me stories when i became older, about the 70´s glory days. He even introduced me to the pop rock band Queen, that became one of my favourite bands in the 80 - 90´s. I still have all their albums, including their first recordings from the beginning of the 70´s. Looking back at this period of time, with so many great bands that came out, and so many fantastic motion pictures that was released, i realise what my dad was talking about. Who have not seen Taxi Driver, The Deer Hunter and many other amazing movies who changed cinema history forever? Dirty Harry, another example of an epic movie that still stands strong today. Speaking of the 70´s, a lot of political changes happened during this time, when criminals took over the streets, including corrupted politicians accepting money. One case that became famous in the end of the 70´s, was ABSCAM. This was an operation by the FBI, where 7 Congressmen were found guilty of criminal charges, and were convicted. American Hustle is a motion picture based on the ABSCAM investigation, directed by David O. Russel, who gave us the fantastic motion picture Silver Linings Playbook, about 2 years ago. I am always interested in true stories brought to a cinema screen, and especially if a talented director is behind the camera. Nominated for 10 Academy Awards earlier this year, is American Hustle a powerful movie as people are saying, or is the hype way bigger than it should be ?

The year is 1978. Con artists Irving Rosenfeld ( Christian Bale ) and Sydney Prosser ( Amy Adams ) work together. Sydney help Irving to improve his skills, while they perform a scam. Irving is still married to his wife Rosalyn Rosenfeld ( Jennifer Lawrence ), but he want a divorce, she does not agree. Irving stay, but only because of his son Danny ( Sonny Corbo ). But when FBI agent Richard Dimaso ( Bradley Cooper ), catch both Irving and Sydney, while they are making a scam, Richard give them a proposition. If they help him to point out criminals, they will be set free. So Irving agree to help Richard. Irving introduce Richard into his world, letting him see how they work. They arrange a meeting with Irving´s friend Paco Hernandez ( Michael Pena ), pretending to be a rich Sheikh Abdullah, so they can scam people in arts business. Richard play along, so they can get more people arrested. But when the Mayor Carmine Polito ( Jeremy Renner ) is mentioned while Irving is doing another scam, Richard realise this could become dangerous. Carmine is very respected in society, who help people in need and own an empire. The FBI is very skeptical, if they can reveal the evidence of Carmine, but Richard have an idea. He can get to Carmine, with the help of Irving and Sydney´s help, because they have some really good connections. But the cover up operation is not going to be easy, and they need to find a way to get Carmine in a trap.

If you love great acting, with a really intelligent storyline, you are going to love American Hustle. Just look at the cast list, Christian Bale, Amy Adams, Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lawrence ? Oh my god, this is a dream come true. There is no doubt why American Hustle was nominated for 10 Academy Awards, acting on this level is not seen very often. But of course we have to thank director David O.Russel, he is without a doubt one of the best directors out there today. Ever since The Fighter in 2010, you could tell he was about to explode with new powerful ideas for more movie scripts. American Hustle is without a doubt his greatest motion picture so far in his career, and he manage to bring the 70´s back on screen in so many great details, you simply love his view of the story behind ABSCAM. Every detail is not correct, if you hear about the real case, but it does not really matter. Because this is a really well made motion picture on so many levels, it is hard to see anything negative at all. I almost forgot to mention Jeremy Renner, i don´t think he have ever been as good as he is in American Hustle, the perfect choice for the character Carmine Polito. Reminds me of Brooklyn gangsters, but he find his own way to portait a corrupted major. Overall i feel you should all see American Hustle, there is a bit of everything here, for fans of old school cinema. I still don´t understand why no one won an Academy Award, at the same time i am happy Dallas Buyers Club did so well at The Academy Awards. Make sure you get yourself a copy of American Hustle on blu-ray, you will guaranteed have a great time.

Rating: DDDD

måndag 21 april 2014

47 Ronin

Japanese samurai warriors. Who does not love watching samurais killing enemies ? It is simply one of those moments in life where you feel so happy, and relaxed, when a samurai chop off a hand, or an arm. This might be a better relax method than yoga. In the cinema world, i have a feeling the most known samurai movie creator is the legend Akira Kurosawa. His samurai classics is still today loved by audiences worldwide, and i don´t think anyone can ever accomplish what Akira Kurosawa did with his unique style of direction. Remember 11 years ago, when Tom Cruise became a samurai in The Last Samurai ? It was a huge box office hit back in 2003, and a return for samurai cinema. Even if i did not love that movie, i did like seeing samurai warriors back on the big screen, because honestly, i think most of us had nightmares after seeing Cameron Diaz hump a ferrari in The Counselor. One samurai movie that never got any attention, just because it was a b movie, was American Samurai. Starring David Bradley and Mark Dacascos, it had a uniqe style, with 2 brothers chosen to fight until death, in a death arena with different warriors. It may not sound like anything interesting, but director Sam Firstenberg gave us a really well made martial arts film, with some nice samurai influences. But since 2003, the only place we get to see samurai movies, is releases from Asia. I would love to see a new samurai movie about samurais killing zombies, or maybe even see them kill mutated piranhas. 47 Ronin is a fantasty action movie, based on the legendary samurai group of the 47 Ronin, that actually existed in Japan. But this is of course a more fictional story, with actor Keanue Reeves on board, with director Carl Rinsch making his direction debut. Is it possible 47 Ronin is just what the samurai cinema needed back on the big screen, or is this the disaster you thought it would be ?

Kai ( Keanu Reeves ) is a half japanese, half english outcast in late medival Japan. Kai lives in the domain of Ako, ruled by Asano Naganori ( Min Tanaka ). When Kai was a young boy, Asano helped him and raised him. Kai remained a family member, even if he is not very respected among other samurai´s. Things become complicated when Kai falls in love with Asano´s daughter, Mika ( Kō Shibasaki ). This romance is not accepted, so they must hide their feelings. Lord Asano is visited by Lord Kira ( Tadanobu Asano ), who is attracted to Mika. Lord Kira arrange a battle, between the Lovecraftian Samurai ( Neil Fingleton ) and Yasuno ( Masayoshi Haneda ). But when Yasuno is found possessed by evil witch Mizuki ( Rinko Kikuchi ), someone need to take his place to fight against Lovecraftian Samurai. Kai dress up using the same outfit meant for Yasuno. But when Kai is revealed, the fact that he is not a real samurai, means he must be punished. Later the same night, Mizuki bewitch Asano, so he think he sees Kai raping Mika, but this is not true. As he is caught in this dream, he strikes against Mika, and see this as he wakes up. He could have killed Mika, and for attacking a Shogunate, the punishment is death. Shogun Tsunayoshi ( Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa ) decide that Asano should not have the most cruel punishment, since he is a respected warrior, instead he let him do this in a honor way, by killing himself. Asano prepare himself to die, and tell Mika to be strong. After the death of Asano,  Tsunayoshi let Lord Kira take over the domain of Ako. Oishi, leader of the Ronin, is thrown in an outdoor pit, to break his spirit. A year later, Oishi is set free, so he set out to find Kai, who is now no longer a citizen of Ako, because he was sold as a slave. Oishi need Kai to take back their village, from the evil Lord Kira, and to kill Mizuki.

Visually i find myself enjoying the action sequences in 47 Ronin. There are some really cool battle scenes here, if you love asian cinema, and martial arts influenced cinematography. But we have a big problem, and i really mean big. The acting here from almost all actors is awful. Keanu Reeves can be a great actor, here he does ok, but it feels like he is not trying very hard. Kō Shibasaki do look pretty, but her acting skills need to be better, she is not the perfect choice as Kai´s girlfriend. There are other actors that feel just placed here, to fill out the characters. This is a shame, because visually director Carl Rinsch have a great idea, and he does know what he is doing on that level. I might sound negative earlier, but let's turn the page. 47 Ronin is a cool samurai action movie, as long as you don't focus on the plot. Because the story is not very deep, even if they try to tell the story in a serious way. The action sequences have some nice treats and look good also, for the most part. 47 Ronin became the biggest box office flop of 2013, maybe people had too high expectations on this adaption. I still enjoy 47 Ronin for what this is, an action movie made for fans of asian martial arts cinema. Now excuse me, i have to use my samurai sword and kill a demon, or wait, is that my neighbour ? Oh well, lets slice first, and i will find out later.

Rating: DDD

söndag 20 april 2014

Battle Of The Damned

Sweden is famous for many things.

Kevin Walker ( Wait, should he be here ? )
Friends In Need

But most of all, we have one reason to be proud in Sweden.

His name is......Dolph Lundgren.

Forget about Ingmar Bergman, he may have made iconic movies, but in Sweden we only have one man who can do anything. Dolph Lundgren is the man, there is no other answer you need to know. He is a great actor, a great director, and all women of Sweden want him, this is 200% true. In fact, if Dolph Lundgren did not make his movies, Sweden would never be famous.

But hold on, Abba made Sweden famous ?

Yeah, maybe at that time, but from the 80´s, Dolph took over and no one could stand a chance against him. Roxette and Ace Of Base sold millions of albums ? Yes but did we really care ? Not really, because all over Sweden everyone loved to see Dolph back on the big screen. I have seen almost every Dolph movie ever made, and they are plenty to choose between. Even if the movie is bad, Dolph is always great, because he can never be bad, he is everything we want. So when i heard that Dolph is making a zombie movie, i got really excited. Finally he is trying a new genre, since he usually deliver his usual action muscle packed dvd releases. Battle Of The Damned is the title, and directed by Christopher Hatton, who also directed B action movie Robotropolis. With a combination of Dolph Lundgren, zombies and robots also, is this the masterpiece that Tv4 personality Anders Kraft was hoping for, or is this a big mess ?

A deadly viral outbreak is turning people into flesh eating zombies all over the world. Military soldier Max Gatling ( Dolph Lundgren ) is one of the few survivors left, with a few soldiers that he try to help survive in this chaotic world. Max is told to search for a woman, named Jude ( Melanie Zanetti ), since her father belive she is still out there alive. Max finds her, but she is skeptical why he needs to bother her. But she agree to go along with him, as they encounter a group of survivors, led by Duke ( David Field ). Duke does not trust Max, so he order his group to chain him to a lamppost. Duke want to continue lead the group and does not want Max to disrupt his plans. But one of the group members realise, Max could be exactly what they need to survive. He knows how to handle combat situations and to survive. Max is finally let loose, now he need to find a way to get everyone into safety, before more zombies invade every single building.

Ladies, if men still don´t understand how you have an orgasm, ask them to watch Battle Of The Damned, and they will realise how it all works. Because honestly, when was the last time you had so much fun watching zombies and robots fight against each other, and have Dolph Lundgren kick zombie ass, all at the same time ? This is exactly what we needed to have on a dvd and blu-ray release, hard hitting action with a cool combination of everything. The acting is not all bad either, especially good is Melanie Zanetti, she is a really cool fighter, and she is pregnant also, that makes things more complicated. Is this the best movie from Dolph in some time ? Yes, actually better than some of the typical releases he have out there. Not as good as Universal Soldier - Day Of Reckoning, but still i like this combination of different genres put together. God bless Dolph Lundgren, he still deliver and i have a feeling he will for many years ahead. This is a fun ride, and a good lesson why swedish movies suck so many times, we need to make quality movies like this one. There are flaws, yes, but hell, let´s just forget about that, and have a good time with Swedens biggest actor of all time.

Rating: DDD

tisdag 15 april 2014

I, Frankenstein

I have not read comic books for over 17 years. But i remember one of the comic books i collected was Conan The Barbarian, before they stopped printing the rest of the series. When i was very young i collected The Hulk, and used to bring those comic books to school. Comic books could help you escape into a different world, where nothing seemed impossible. Even if i don´t read comic books anymore, i really enjoy watching movie adaptions of comic characters. Especially from Marvel, who does not love X-Men or Thor ? It is easy to forget that there are many different comic book characters out there, that don´t get to be seen by a larger scale of readers. I, Frankenstein is one example. To be honest, i have never heard about this comic book character, until a movie adaption was released early this year. I decided to take a look, since i usually like movie adaptions made from comic books. Is I, Frankenstein a fun combination of horror action, or is this nothing you need to spend time on ?

In 1795, Dr. Victor Frankenstein ( Aden Young ) create a monster, made of body parts of corpses. His name is Adam Frankenstein ( Aaron Eckhart ). Adam kill Victor´s wife Elizabeth ( Virginie Le Brun ) in rage, as he leave his home, wandering out in the world. Victor goes after Adam, to revenge his wifes death. But while the hunt is on, Victor die in terrible weather. Adam bury Victor, but is suddenly attacked by demons. He is saved by gargoyles, who are half humans, half beasts. They take Adam to the gargoyle queen Lenore ( Miranda Otto ), and their commander, Gideon ( Jai Courtney ). Lenore explain to Adam that they were created to battle demons on earth and save humanity. The gargoyles offer him to join them in their battle. He help them kill demons that attack their headquarters, but he refuse to do more and continue his journey instead. As a new century arrive, Adam is still looking for answers of who he is. At a night club, Adam kills a police officer at a confrontation, and the demon Helek ( Steve Mouzakis ) inform the demon prince Naberius ( Bill Nighly ), that Adam is alive. Naberius is very interested in Adam, how he was created by his creator Victor Frankenstein, since Victor´s journal explain how Adam was made into a living beast. Adam visit Naberius for answers, but realise that they only want to use him. Adam have seen that Naberius have dead bodies that he intend to use to bring a beasts to life. This would be a disaster, so Adam escape from Naberius and confront his scientist Terra Wade ( Yvonne Strahovski ). She knows that Naberius have evil plans, as she slowly become attached to Adam and his life. Adam go to the gargoyles queen Lenore, to warn them about Naberius plans. But Lenore also want the journal, as she sends Gideon to kill Adam. Gideon fails, and now Adam decide he must finish this. He burns the journal, and prepare himself for a final battle.

Even if i read all the bad reviews of I, Frankenstein, i had at least some hope for this to be a fun ride, especially after watching the trailer. After almost 90 minutes, i realise that i might have been wrong. Ok, i did not have high expectations, but when you see how bad some of the special effects are, you begin to wonder why director Stuart Beattie did not spend more time, improving details in the fight scenes. Aaron Eckhart tries to do what he can with his character Adam, and he is actually the biggest advantage to this movie adaption of the comic book. Bloodydisgusting really hated this movie, and called this one of the worst films this year already. I am not going in the same direction, i suppose there is a reason i did not hate this. I like the idea of a creation of Victor Frankenstein fighting demons, in a future world. But there are many details that could have been made much better, and some of the actors are really terrible. I, Frankenstein is not as much fun as i was hoping it would be. In the hands of another director, with a different vision, i think this could have been made different. Since the box office numbers were pretty bad, i don´t see a sequel is possible. If you loved Underworld, i suggest you watch that one instead. I, Frankenstein had potential, but the final product leave us with too many questions, and very few answers.

Rating: DD

måndag 14 april 2014


I don´t know if you have heard of the name Park Chan-wook, a South Korean director. If you have not seen any of his movies, you really need to run down to your closest dvd rental store. One of his first most praised movies, was Sympathy Fór Mr. Vengeance in 2002. The movie did get a wide release in most countries, but in America it was only shown in 6 movie screens. Why ? I ask myself that, this was a very powerful motion picture. But just a year later, Park Chan-wook was back with his next chapter of The Vengeance Trilogy ( 3 Movies were made to follow each other ), and this one was named Oldboy. Movie critics became crazy about Oldboy, the reviews were very positive and the audience loved his latest creation. Oldboy proved to be both original and a very psychological thriller, with a unique style. I did not get to see Oldboy until 2004, so when i got myself a chance to buy a dvd from England, i booked straight away. Oh man, i really loved this one. This is without a doubt a classic, and became a box office hit worldwide, considering the budget was only 3 million dollars. 10 years later, came some very bizarre news. Legendary director Spike Lee is doing a remake of Oldboy. The first thing that crossed my mind was, how can you remake Oldboy ? Do we really need a remake ? I respect Spike Lee, this is the director who gave us Malcolm X, Summer Of Sam, Do The Right Thing, and many other classic motion pictures. But why would he remake Oldboy ? I still don´t understand, i suppose he must have enjoyed the original motion picture, but that does not seem like a good reason to remake a classic. Even if i was skeptical, i decided to watch the remake anyway. Is this remake a worthy updated version of Park Chan-wook´s cult movie, or is this as bad as i feared it would be ?

October, 1993, advertising executive Joe Doucett ( Josh Brolin ) ruins a meeting with a potential client, Daniel Newcome ( Lance Reddick ). The reason why Joe failed, is that he hit on Daniel´s girlfriend. Depressed about the situation, Joe drink heavy that night. He tries to go in to his friend Chucky´s ( Michael Imperioli ) own bar, but he is closed, so Joe continue walking the streets. He find an asian girl, selling asian figures, as he buy one for his daughters birthday. But suddenly everything becomes blurry, and Joe wakes up the next day, what he belive is a hotel room. But something is wrong, he can not get out. There is a door that is blocked, with a camera watching him. Someone have locked him up in this room for a reason. Days go by, the only time he have contact is when someone leaves food, opening a door gap. Days go by, and Joe still have no idea who is doing this. Suddenly one day, as he is watching tv, he find out his ex-wife have been found murdered, police suspect Joe is guilty and his daugther Mia is now adopted. 20 years have passed, and Joe realise he need to do something, or he will never get out. He tries to escape through the bathroom wall, using a certain technique, that seem to go well. Until he is drugged, and wake up in a box. He is out and free to go, but now he need to find answers to who locked him up. Joe visit Chucky and try to get his help to find information. The hunt is on, and Joe will not stop until someone is punished.

I don't mind remakes, if they manage to make it worthy the original motion picture, and still bring something fresh, without copying the same story. This is the problem with Oldboy. This is not a bad remake, but the problem is that director Spike Lee almost copy and make the same story, in an american version. He should have changed the storyline instead and found a different twist, but he choose to do everything too simple. Josh Brolin in the leading role is not bad, he does what he can to make his character vulnerable. I am dissapointed that a legendary director like Spike Lee could not make this a worthy remake. There are some good scenes, but overall i just don´t understand why this was made this way. Oldboy is not awful, there are some good parts where Josh Brolin deliver a pretty solid performance, including Samuel L Jackson in a small role. But still, i can not recommend you to see this one, instead i suggest you see the original motion picture. Let this be a lesson for today kids, never remake a cult movie unless you do it in a right way.

Rating: DD

tisdag 8 april 2014


There are so many motion pictures, and tv shows, based on ancient legends from history. Hercules, Poseidon, Hades, greek warriors from the greek mythology, there are plenty of diffent adaptions of legendary icons. Attila The Hun was the ruler of the Huns, between the years 434 until his death in 453, located near the Baltic Sea. I have not seen the tv series from 2001, with a younger Gerald Butler as Attila, but this version is completely different. Here we have a new motion picture, from the company The Asylum, who bring us B movies all year long. You probably have seen Sharknado by now, one of their biggest masterpieces ( almost ). Sharknado 2 - The Second One is coming out this summer, so i suggest you check that one out. So with a legend in history in the hands of The Asylum, is this a new classic from this cult company, or is Attila another awful release that will be forgotten ?

Attila ( Cris Cole ) is a mighty warrior, and the ruler of the Huns, killing anyone who stands in his way. Attila finds The Staff Of Moses, that is said to raise the dead. Before he dies, he made sure The Staff is broken into 3 pieces across the globe, so no one would find it.

Present day. A team of american soldiers find a piece of The Staff Of Moses, but professor Mason ( Krisle-Roy ) make sure he can investigate the ancient mystery. The Staff is secretely locked in, what seems to be a stone shaped object. A figure is seen inside the stone, as Dr. Buckingham ( Bill Voorhees ) is told that this may be Nomad ( Cheick Congo ), protector of The Staff Of Moses. Dr. Buckingham manage to get a piece of the staff out, but he also awake Nomad. Military Vito ( Chris Conrad ) is at the compound when Nomad is released, Vito and his team goes out to find Nomad and destroy the beast. But General Thadeus ( M. Steven Felty ) manage to get the 2 other missing pieces of The Staff Of Moses. If one drink the blood of The Staff Of Moses, he will bring Attila back to life. Vito and his team must stop this from happening

I have no problem with very low budget movies, as long as they give entertainment. But with Attila we have so many problems, i do not know where i should start. Attilas monster face looks really bad. The acting is really awful, and they are trying to look serious with very bad results. There is a lot of action here, but it is so bad that i laughed, many times. In fact, Attila is a motion picture with too many flaws, and with nothing to offer. This is not the worst i have seen The Asylum company release straight to dvd, but considering how much they could have done right with this material, it feels like director Emmanuel Itier had a vision but completely lost his way. I can not recommend Attila, not even to you who love cheesy B movies, because this is not worth your time. I suggest you go and rent Bad Milo! instead, or perhaps even buy Sharknado. Just skip this one, this is almost as bad as TV3´s terrible tv show Småstadsdrottningar.

Rating: D

söndag 6 april 2014


If you don´t like action, and you are not a fan of Jason Statham, you better stop reading now. As an action star, he have really proved himself to be one of the best british fighters on screen, but not only that, he tries to develope his characters into different stories. The Transporter got me hooked up over 12 years ago, and everytime he released a new dvd, i tried to watch, hoping he would deliver once again. I must say i enjoy him most so far in The Expendables, and i am looking forward to see him in the third one this summer. I finally got a chance to see one of his latest motion pictures called Homefront. With a screenplay written by Sylvester Stallone ( he is also one of the producers of Homefront ), and with a great cast of James Franco, Winona Ryder and Kate Bosworth, this looks like a formula that could work. But hold on a second, this is the best part. The director of Homefront is Gary Fleder, who directed one of my all time favourite 90´s movie classics, Things To Do In Denver When You´re Dead. If you have not seen this one, you have too. Especially for Treat Williams, this could be his best performances ever in his career. With so many great names involved, is Homefront an action movie for all of us who love video violence, or is this just another typical Statham motion picture but with nothing to offer ?

DEA agent Phil Broker ( Jason Statham ) move to the countryside with his daughter Maddy Broker ( Izabela Vidovic ). They try to start a new life in small town. One day at Maddy´s school, A bully, Teddy Klum( Austin Craig ) try to beat her up, but since she have learned to defend herself, she brake the nose of Teddy. Phil gets a phone call and is asked to come to school to talk to one of her teachers. Teddy´s mother Cassie Bodine Klum ( Kate Bosworth ) is furious about what Maddy did, and tell her husband Jimmy Klum ( Marcus Hester ) to punsch down Phil, because his daughter hurt their son. Jimmy is injured quickly, and asked to leave Phil and his daughter alone. Cassie is pissed and want someone to take care of Phil, because nobody touch her family. So she go to her brother Morgan " Gator " Bodine ( James Franco ), a drug traffickers leader, so he can take care of Phil. Morgan think this will be easy, even if he find out Phil is a former DEA agent. But once he begin sending out his men, to clean up, all hell breaks loose.

If you were hoping for something original, Homefront is not what you want to see. On the other hand, if you like to see farm boys being beaten up, then you found your place for sure. Remember when Jean-Claude Van Damme tried to do a more serious action movie with Nowhere To Run ? Homefront is a more serious try from Jason Statham, to go out from the extreme violence, and still do action in a different way. Don´t worry though, there are fighting scenes here, but director Gary Fleder tries to lift out a more deeper story between the action sequences. Is Homefront predictable ? Yes, very, but the story is actually not bad, and i do like some of the performances, especially from Kate Bosworth. Jason Statham does what he usually do, look very manly and not afraid of anyone, just the way we want him to be. James Franco may not do one of his better characters, but as Gator he give us a pretty nasty bad guy, that fits the character. The biggest problem with Homefront is that we know exactly what will happen, and i don´t like predictable movies, unless they have somethin else to offer. Thankfully the actors give us enough to hold this together, and i really love the sound effects in the fight scenes. It is almost as if you can feel the punches Statham gives, and that is not easy to do. Fed up with boring romantic comedies, and just want to grab some beers and watch action ? I think Homefront could be what you are looking for. Not one of Jason Statham´s better action movies, but a good try to do something different in his genre.

Rating: DDD

Grand Piano

I am a big fan of Brian De Palma´s earlier motion pictures. One of my personal favourites is Blow Out, a very intensive thriller about a sound engineer who happens to film a car accident, but witness that someone actually murdered this person. One of John Travolta´s best performances in his career. Let´s not forget, it was Brian De Palma who gave us his remake of Scarface, maybe one of the best remakes ever in movie history. I have to mention The Untouchables also, such a great gangster drama movie with fantastic performances from Robert De Niro, Kevin Costner, Sean Connery and Andy Garcia. Lately he have not directed so many motion pictures, his latest one is called Passion, and was released in 2012. Maybe he is slowing down at the age of 73, but hopefully he will return at least one more time, becuase this man is a fantastic director. Grand Piano is said to be inspired by Brian De Palma´s earlier work, and the director behind this motion picture is Eugenio Mira. To be honest with you, i have not seen any of his earlier work, but i have heard of his movie Agnosia, since it was praised by critics in the year 2010. Ever since i heard about Grand Piano, i got excited. Elijah Wood in the leading role was one reason, but also that this was to be inspired by De Palma got my attention. Considering Grand Piano have been praised by critics, is this a thriller of high quality, or is the hype way too big to be true ?

Tom Selznick (Elijah Wood) is a piano player, who were so close to become a superstar, but his stage fright took over. After many years away, trying to deal with his problems, he is convinced to return to a performance, to show the world that he is ready for a comeback. As the audience is getting seated, everyone in the orchestra is ready to start the concert, Tom begin to play. Suddenly he finds words written in the note papers. It says that if he plays one note wrong, and he will be killed. Every page he turns, there is a new message, and he have to follow everything he is told. While Tom get a pause, he is told to go to a dressing room. Here is a earphone, with a voice presenting himself to be Patrick Goudreaux ( John Cusack ), who will kill his wife Emma Selznick ( Kerry Bishé ) on the balchony where she sits in the theater, unless he follow his orders. Tom return to continue playing the piano, as Patrick tell him more information. He want Tom to play the best piano concert of his life, or he will be killed.

I have to say, Grand Piano is both a original thriller, and a very crafted piece of cinema experience. There are not many motion pictures i can compare this too, but suddenly i remember one. Phone Booth, the fantastic thriller by director Joel Schumacher. These are 2 very different stories, but the idea of someone forcing you to do certain things, or you will be killed is in both of these stories, told in very different ways. One detail that make Grand Piano original, is the fact that we don´t get to see classical music thrillers very often, set in an orchestra theatre. There are many scenes were you get to see Elijah Wood play the piano for real, and that makes his character feel more realistic, especially since he really tries to look like a professional piano player. I really loved Elijah Wood in Maniac, he may not be as powerful here, but still this is a really good performance. John Cusack´s voice works very well, while we follow the storyline. I will say that the plot is not very deep, but director Eugenio Mira have a sense of building a thriller in a very detailed way, without using the typical Hollywood chilché style. There are some scenes where it might be a bit slow, but overall i have to say Grand Piano is really good. If you love Brian De Palma´s earlier work, and even some Hitchcock influences, this will be a treat for you.

Rating: DDDD

tisdag 1 april 2014


How many of you did love Sharknado, raise your hands.

Everyone ? That is fantastic, you can understand why everyone loved Sharknado, it was a B movie with all the ingredients you need. Bad acting, bad special effects, cheesy lines, this is all you need to have an orgasm in your couch. The Asylum is a company who knows how to make great B movies, that sometimes are so bad they are fun to watch. So last week i decided to choose 2 quite fresh movies from the same company that brought us Sharknado. So if you were hoping to read a review on a romantic movie, this is no doubt your worst nightmare. Battledogs combine werewolves with military action, is it possible this is the perfect action movie for fans of Britt Ekland, or is this another B movie you will forget ?

At an airport in New York, photographer Donna Voorhees ( Ariana Richards ) have been infected from a werewolf bite. She transform into a werewolf and attack other people inside the airport. More people are now infected, as the military go in to handle the situation. Every infected person is taken to a facility, led by Lt. General Christopher Monning ( Dennis Haysbert ). He says that he know how to handle the situation, but still begin a test, where he let werewolves attack each other for fun. This is something Major Brian Hoffman ( Craig Sheffer ) is not happy about, he want to make sure every infected is not treated in any danger. Dr. Ellen Gordon ( Kate Vernon ) is working on a cure with her co workers, trying to figure out where this all begun. Major Brian is also trying to find answers, before more people are infected.

Battledogs is a mix of Outbreak ( remember the virus movie with Dustin Hoffman ? ) and a werewolf version of Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes. I am not sayíng that Battledogs tries to copy everything, but you can tell they mixed ideas from these movies into their own version. The positive surprise of Battledogs is that there is actually a plot here. It is not all action and nothing else, the quarantine story is not all bad. But the acting is of course not so good, from either way. And this is too bad, because this could have been a more deeper production from The Asylum, if they did get the actors to work harder on their characters. You can tell director Alexander Yellen have a good idea, but in the finish line there are too many flaws. The werewolves look pretty silly, and this is another detail that could have been improved. Still, i would say Battledogs is at least an improvement from other really bad B movies from The Asylum. There is potential here, and for that i would say Battledogs is not terrible. Ernie Hudson is here also, one of the few actors who at least give a performance. Maybe if they make a sequel we can get all the things that need to be improved.

Rating: DD